This article begins from the premise that it is important to explore how people unlearn, as well as learn, specifically in terms of extremist or violent attitudes. Three different country examples are given of intergroup encounters that interrupt rigidities in attitudes: working across ethnic groups in Sri Lanka, tackling religious divides in Northern Ireland through shared classes, and initiatives to prevent violent extremism in the United Kingdom. Pedagogical implications of unlearning involve working with the four Ds of deradicalization, debiasing, disengagement and desistence.